Displaying items by tag: Funny

YA Guide for the Confused

Wednesday, 25 July 2012 09:15
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Tis the season for YA book lists, it seems, but apparently there's a little confusion out there as to what constitutes YA. As in, my-head-in-a-blender confusion. As the blogger who will get even more of my love by the end of this post writes:

[YA] does not stand for “Young Age” nor does it stand for “Yeah, Anything.” It stands for “Young Adult,” meaning—loosely—“teen.”

Witness the confusion here. NPR, bless them, has got a mega-list of book titles up, and they are inviting you and everybody else to vote for 10 favorites. Now, the comments on this post are F.U.L.L. of people bemoaning the absence of their favorite "YA" books. Like... Alice in Wonderland, Chronicles of Narnia, and Harriet the Spy.  None of which, you will soon come to understand, are YA.

Let the record show, though, that NPR's panel actually did a pretty good job of (gasp) limiting themselves to books that could be conceivably construed as YA.

Consider, by contrast, a recent Huffington Post slideshow on fearless YA characters that included in its list the following (very much NOT YA) titles: Encyclopedia Brown (possibly prompted by the recent death of the author?), The Phantom Tollbooth (huh??), A Wrinkle in Time, The Wizard of Oz, Ramona Quinby, The Secret Garden, and others undeniably outside the YA category by any definition... except maybe "not for adults." In fact, I'd say of the 14, only 3 of the titles (The Hunger Games; Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret; and The Chocolate War) are solidly YA. Harry Potter and The Lord of the Rings are iffy.

Now, let me buffer all of this by saying that I realize not everybody is as YA obsessed as us author/librarian/publisher/editor types. But guess what? There's no longer an excuse because a brilliant blogger over at Clear Eyes, Full Shelves has generated this wonderfully useful (and funny) guide to YA identification.

Did you think that YA means "teen characters"? Or that everything you read as a teen was YA? Or that if it has a cartoon on the cover, it must be YA? 

If you answered "yes" to any of the above, that's okay; we can still be friends. But you do need re-education.

For the record, the Carolrhoda Lab (my publisher) mission statement contains my favorite definition of YA--or at least the YA I write: "distinctive, provocative, boundary-pushing fiction for teens and their sympathizers." 

Oh, and there's more discussion of defining YA here, if you still have an appetite for it.

A collection of micro-confessions

Thursday, 19 April 2012 10:44
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If you didn't know, I'm on Twitter: @ashleyhopeperez. I've discovered that--for better or worse--Twitter lends itself to micro-confessions. I'm a bit of a confession junkie (for example, I MIGHT make a weekly stop to postsecret.com to see the latest in minor and major postcard confessions.)

Here are a few of my own small confessions from Twitter...

Sometimes, on my Mac, I "Force Quit" an application--even when it's behaving fine--just to feel powerful.

I used to giggle every time I saw the word “SIEMENS” on an appliance. Now, thanks to a WWII history buff, I think of concentration camp labor.

I place candy wrappers under poop-bomb diaper in trash to avoid spousal detection.·

At 9mos, our son got into the cat food on my watch. The worst = I think he liked it.

I used to have an irrational fear of odd numbers & argued a grade down once because of it.

Did an image search for “miscarriage” (book research) and was sorry.

I’m learning what potty-training involves, and sometimes I wish I could keep Liam in diapers.

Now that you know some of what you've been missing (I also retweet interesting articles and book-related stuff), go follow @ashleyhopeperez on Twitter. :)

How to accidentally make 10 gallons of chicken soup

Monday, 26 September 2011 11:15
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After my recent blog post on losing a day in Paris, someone innocently inquired as to how I managed to *accidentally* make 10 gallons of soup. This is also for Sarah, who wanted to know about the tiny chickens.

It's like this, Adam: you say to yourself, we are so poor, we have to make the most of every rotisserie chicken we buy. Hence, make soup with the bones.

Only... you don't count on gobbling up those (relatively) tiny chickens three times a week.

Then, lurking in your fridge, you have a giant bucket of chicken stock you've cooked with all those little clucker carcasses. You put it on the stove.

Then you think, with all this stock, I better add a lot of noodles and veggies. And then you keep having to get out more pots to hold it all. It's madness, really.

Does anybody have ideas for what else I can make with chicken stock? Because I think my boys are going to go on strike if I do this again.

P.S. Not that I'm complaining about the tiny French chickens. That's probably how chickens are supposed to be. The ones I was used to buying in the US probably had bigger breasts than Barbie; I bet those poor chicks couldn't even stand up. Not cool.

P.P.S. When you buy your eggs in French, the package tells you how they were raised. Not just "en plein aire" for the ones that got to live outside, but also "en cage" on the ones from "traditional" farms. So you really are confronted with what your purchase means. 

Fancy-pants foodie recipes devolve into THIS.

Friday, 16 September 2011 11:46
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Okay, I love looking at pictures of beautiful food. I love thinking about making it. Especially beautiful desserts like this one from Gourmet. But sometimes, it all just starts looking too difficult, complicated. Don't get me wrong: I can handle my cookie recipes just fine, but start telling me to make a crumb-sealing layer on a cake, and I start to get tired. Here's, "My Drunk Kitchen," the cookies episode with a nice send-up of the "secret codes" in recipes. If you aren't laughing by the end, well, loosen the f**k up.*

*That last bit wasn't really as gratuitous as it seems: it's a way of warning you that there's some casual bad language in the video.

From My Writer's Notebook: (Bad) Get-Rich-Quick Advice

Friday, 19 August 2011 10:24
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So every once and a while my writing group will do a writing exercise together. I think these are great because they produce surprises. Lots of times lazy me writes things that I can use in my current book project (why waste effort? why not be surprised with usable material?), but occasionally I just have fun. These entries were from a prompt on getting rich quick. When my group member read the prompt, she said, "Number 168, get rich quick." I heard the "Number 168" as part of the prompt, which is why I ended up writing fake, numbered, get-rich-quick tips. Apparently, though, 168 was just the number of the prompt.

Hey, who cares as long as some play or writing comes out of the exercise?

 

Get Rich Quick #168. Wealth is a habit of mind—collect bottle caps, cover them with a handkerchief, and will them to be gold pieces.

Get Rich Quick #418. Have piles of phone books? Think of all those yellow pages as free toilet paper. Money you don’t send is money in the bank. Quick is relative.

Get Rich Quick #1328. Get a job as a bellhop so you can spend your days opening doors for strangers. Karma will be on your side.

Get Rich Quick #46. Join a pyramid scheme, being sure to join it at the top.

Get Rich Quick #232. Discover gold, oil, or the lost pet of a tycoon.

Get Rich Quick #111. Volunteer to take the collection at your church, and then do so.

Gobbling up Jordan Sonnenblick's DRUMS, GIRLS, AND DANGEROUS PIE and AFTER EVER AFTER

Monday, 15 August 2011 10:05
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I admired Jordan Sonnenblick before I even knew his books. Like me, he put in a number of years teaching in the public schools of Houston through Teach For America. Plus he's a funny, unassuming guy who is unstinting when it comes to sharing his experiences. Among other things, he gave me heaps of advice about managing publicity and pulling off high-quality author visits.

 Maybe all this awesomeness contributed to the moment of fear that struck my first-time-author heart: what if I don't like the work as much as I like the person?

Not to fear, though: Drums, Girls, and Dangerous Pie and the companion novel After Ever After hit all the right notes. These are middle-grade fiction at its best. Put it out there for guys or girls. Serve it up in class or outside. These books are real without crossing any of those tricky boundaries that are so worrisome for librarians and teachers of the younger crowd.

Here's a quick summary of the two books (excerpted from the positive Kirkus reviews of the books) before I touch on some of the things that I liked best:

Drums, Girls, and Dangerous Pie (2005): Steven Alper, who is untalented in sports but terrific on the drums, is giving his pesky five-year-old brother Jeffrey oatmeal when Jeffrey, who has been complaining recently that his “parts hurt,” falls off a stool and gets a nosebleed that just won’t quit. That night Steven finds out that Jeffrey has leukemia.

After Ever After (2010)In this companion novel to Drums, Girls & Dangerous Pie (2005), Steven’s little brother Jeffrey, now in eighth grade and in full remission from leukemia, discovers that happily ever after isn’t quite what he expected.

I accidentally listened to these books out of order, hearing Jeffrey's story in After Ever After before Steven's. It didn't really matter, though, because After Ever After really is a companion book, not a sequel, and nothing is lost for readers who haven't read D,G, and DP. The self-deprecating humor and general wholesomeness of the guys is a common thread, but Steven and Jeffrey's challenges, strengths, and outlooks are appropriately distinguished. Together, the two novels offer a view of how childhood cancer affects--and continues to affect--families.

After Ever After in particular helps readers think about something that they might not consider: the many costs and complications of life for a childhood cancer survivor. Jeffrey and his friend Tad (also a cancer survivor) have to live with side effects from treatment that touch everything from their fine motor control to their walking ability, their memory to their problem-solving skills. (FYI I was intrigued to hear mention of Gleevec as a treatment for one of the boys as this is the medication my Dad has been on as a treatment for gastrointestinal cancer.)

For all their differences, both Steven and Jeffrey are the kind of sweet but not too sweet boys I hope that Liam will grow into. The books are clean but not squeaky; Sonnenblick's pitch-perfect voice keeps the reader from ever thinking for a second that the writer is writing at a younger audience. This is writing for middle-grade readers at its best.

I know I mentioned the humor already, but really. Really. So funny. Like Tad in After Ever After calling his little sister the "emergency replacement child" that his parents cooked up just in case he croaked. In light of my colossal inability to generate humor, this kind of funny floors me.

Liam, will you please read these books with me when you are approaching your middle-school man-child years? 

Better than imagining them in their underwear: writers & kitties

Monday, 06 June 2011 07:58
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I'm a writer. I'm a student of literature. I'm a teacher. In my literary bible, the words of Borges, Cortázar, Bishop, Hemingway, and company appear in red. (For you heathens, red-letter bibles have the words of Christ in red.)

RedLetterBible

Sometimes, though, it's good to remember that even great writers and thinkers have (or had) to change their underwear and brush their teeth. They trim their toenails and take dumps. And they have kitties.

When I got the link to this site full of writers and their kitties, it changed my life. Okay, maybe that's a bit of an overstatement. But it really does make a difference. Let's take a recent example.

In an interview last week, the acclaimed Trinidadian writer V.S. Naipaul dished up a healthy serving of sexism, insisting, "I read a piece of writing and within a paragraph or two I know whether it is by a woman or not. I think [it is] unequal to me." He attributed this inadquacy to women's "sentimentality, the narrow view of the world...she is not a complete master of a house, so that comes over in her writing too." (Read more quotations from the interview here.)

That's pretty inflammatory stuff, and we can have some good laughs at Naipaul's expense--I started by taking The Guardian's gender and prose test. I also spent some time contemplating the irony of that "master of a house" comment... especially since A House for Mr. Biswas is all about a man's ongoing failure to be master of a house.

But then I see a picture of V.S. with a kitty. And I just can't stay mad. I start thinking of him trimming his toenails and clipping his nose hairs and being human. I mean, if he can pet a kitty, can he be that bad? (I'm sure this is dangerous logic.)

I'm also now considerably less intimidated by a number of authors. Here are a few of my favorite photos. Head over to Writers & Kitties for more.

Cortazarkitty

Julio Cortázar and kitty.

DerridaKitty

Jacques Derrida and kitty.

ElizabethBishopKitty

Elizabeth Bishop and kitty.

Hemingwaykitty

Hemingway and kitty.

Ashley gets munched (find me at The Book Muncher)

Monday, 02 May 2011 07:10
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Hey, today head over to The Book Muncher to check out my guest post on how knowing my audience helps me write. Also, check out my responses to Rachael's random questions. You'll learn about my (secret?) obsession, the strangest thing I've ever done, and the t-shirt that prompts my evil laughter.

Heywood Banks and "Yeah, toast!"

Friday, 22 April 2011 08:05
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For Arnulfo's birthday, we went to see Heywood Banks at a comedy club. He was quite funny in a goofy, self-deprecating way. The show was completely clean (I didn't realize I'd bought tickets to a "family friendly" show), which amazed me since we've been to many comedy club acts that were hilarious but also full of sexual humor and lots of profanity.

The whole time we were there, a girl--probably ten years old--kept turning to her dad after each joke and asking him, "why is everybody laughing?" This reminded me how much humor has to do with audience... like the fact that Banks wasn't cussing didn't necessarily mean that his humor would hit the right nerve with younger kids.

This is something that I can observe but have no aspirations to "tailor" humor for any audience, short of the ridiculous faces and noises I make to entertain Liam. In fact, when it comes to my writing (and real life, come to think of it), I pretty much never try to be funny. Humor is effort-ful for me which somehow undoes its possibility of being effective with a listener. Being funny: right up there with being able to sing. Hey, a gal can't have it all.

But Heywood Banks is funny AND he sings. Click below for his signature "Yeah, TOAST!" routine. By the way, after our show, these five teenagers pulled pieces of actual toasted bread out of their bags to have a photo opp with Banks. That's fame!

Tax Day: Laugh It Off

Friday, 15 April 2011 09:00
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So today is tax day. You're stressed out because you're still trying to get them done and H&R Block's online tax friend keeps crashing on you. Or you've sent them in--along with all that money you didn't know you owed the IRS. Even if you got money back, the stress of others is contagious, so you need to laugh. And possibly feel that someone has it worse. Like the guy who has to put a sign on his door to keep the neighbor's dog poop away. That sucks.

How to Suck at Facebook (by Oatmeal.com) -- I laughed out loud (literally) repeatedly. Warning: you may recognize yourself or someone you love here.

Misery Bear's Day Off -- the BBC brings you a precious teddy bear whose life (always) sucks. He makes a really cute sound before puking after too much Jack Daniels.

The Book of Biff on "milk straight from the container" -- As a nursing mom, you'd better believe I picture someone other than a dairy cow inside this barn--I think this dude totally just accosted a lady breastfeeding her little farmboy baby in there. :)

If you're still feeling cranky, at least you didn't just wash your husband's iTouch with the sheets like I did. How's that for a thank you for his hard work filing the taxes?